Pain is A Guide
Most people are living an unempowered life. When they get angry they shout. When they feel hurt, they withdraw emotionally. When they don’t want to experience the pain of feeling rejected or not having the world the way they want it to be, they work harder or have sex or take a drink and all of that is a loss of power. You lose power when you are controlled by external circumstances. Gary Zukav
Every time you face the pain, you decrease it's power, every time you leave the cookie (yes the chocolate chip cookie) you give it less power, every time you don't make that call, send that text to the partner who you know you are settling to be with for whatever reason, he/she is married, disrespectful, dishonest, stunting your growth and so on, you gain some more authentic power
Authentic power according to Gary Zukav is the alignment of your soul with your personality.
You experience your soul each time you sense yourself as more than a mind and body, your life as meaningful, or you feel that you have gifts to give and you long to give them.
Pain is a guide. Listen to it, run from it and you will meet it up again either in a different person, a different form. We as human's like comfort, we resist pain, and run to things to stop or mask it, sit with it, talk to it, invite it in and get the lessons. It won't kill you.
Painful emotions show you what prevents you from creating harmony, cooperation, sharing and reverence for life.
Don't run from it
According to Gary Zukav "This is how to avoid re-creating painful situations: Take the time to discover your real intention before you act. If it is to change someone or the world so that you will feel safe or better about yourself, don't act on it, because it is an intention of fear and can create only painful consequences."
TED Talk: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VH1K7nRGrYc