Akosua Dardaine Edwards

Let's Share Lessons on The Journey

Akosua Dardaine Edwards - author, writer, coach, gender specialist, speaker

 

Clarity will give you Guidance

Your Silence Will Not Protect You - Audre Lorde


There is power in your story. Your Power

Your story may irritate some,  piss some off, make others uncomfortable, people will call you names like emotional, high strung, opinionated, arrogant, even bitchy.

So what's the alternative?

Stay silent?

Change to suit each name?

Nah. For what?

Because the world will not end if people call you names

The way you tell your story may free you, it may free others

it may alter your world - inside and outside

it will bring you wings, it will bring you clarity

And clarity will keep you open to what life wants to give you

Life usually has something better in store than you've "listed"

Clarity will give you the guidance when to speak up and when to shut up

When to share your story

Peace


Have you read any of Akosua's work?

What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love



Nyabo (Madam) - Why Are You Here?

Daily Lessons on the Journey - A Journal


Follow Akosua on

Twitter

Instagram

Facebook

Your Needs Are Important

Complaints are often doorways to unmet wants and needs. Mastin Kipp

When our needs are met, we are content. When our needs are unmet, we are fitful and we tend to complain.

Somehow, people have difficulty in sharing what their needs are, especially the people pleasers

There are times when people express their needs and they are scolded, dismissed, ignored or denied. Over time these actions convert into not asking for what you need, ignoring our own needs because of the false belief that it is not important, feeling guilty about our needs and justifying not having our needs met.

Lovies, your needs are important, your needs are important!

And it starts with you.

You meet your own needs then it paves the way of how others interact with you.

When we believe that we are unable to express our needs, resentment grows, and complaining starts

Find the courage to speak up about your needs

Find the courage to meet your own needs

Find the courage to accept that not everyone would be either able to meet your needs or even want to

Acceptance leads to making a firm decision on a way forward

It builds self respect, it contributes to self love.

This has been a huge lesson for me, I have been practising both speaking up about my needs and accepting the consequences. The magic lies in the courage

Remember - your needs are important!

Peace

Have you read any of Akosua's work?

What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love



Nyabo (Madam) - Why Are You Here?

Daily Lessons on the Journey - A Journal


Follow Akosua on

Twitter

Instagram

Facebook


What I Love About All My Favourite Women

How you listen is how you live. Unknown

I read a post by one of my favourite writers Maxie McCoy, she had a list of the things her favourite women tribe do, I was inspired by this to make a compilation of my own.

What I love about my favourite women

1. They speak what is on their mind, unapologetically and in love


2. They show up! sometimes with wine, sometimes with soup, sometimes in heels


3. They check in - text, email, phone call


4. They are full of ideas, they share them with no expectation 


5. They can cook - yes, I like my belly, and they share their food


6.They have boundaries and they respect yours


7. They have a strong NO and a firm YES


8. They share in your wins


9. They quote you to yourself


10. They laugh with you and for you, they love to laugh

Have you read any of Akosua's work?

What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love

Nyabo (Madam) - Why Are You Here?

Daily Lessons on the Journey - A Journal


Follow Akosua on

Twitter

Instagram

Facebook




Are You in Alignment?

"You have to close the gap on who you say you are and how you are behaving" - Marianne

Williamson

One of my favourite lessons is - thought, word and deed must add up for clarity. For clarity of prayer and for clarity of movement. The Universe responds to clarity and consistency.

For us to say we want something or what to do something yet our thoughts, our words and our actions do not line up, it throws some confusion into your request.

If you want to get a certification in engineering, your actions alone will not make it happen. There has to be the combination of believing that it can be done (thought), going to class  and doing the assignments (action) and speaking truthfully and positively about the experience. Without that combination, trust me, it will be harder to manifest your vision.

How many times do we want something and believe we cannot have it, and talk about it as if it is impossible yet our actions move towards obtaining it?

They must all line up. Thought. Word. Deed

A very special person that I hold dear to me reminded me of this on Tuesday, she said that my actions and beliefs are not meshing, especially where my finances are concerned. I really took stock of what she said

It reminded me if I am out of alignment, any movement forward will be more difficult.

Are you in Alignment?

Peace

Have you read any of Akosua's work?

What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love

Nyabo (Madam) - Why Are You Here?

Daily Lessons on the Journey - A Journal


Follow Akosua on

Twitter

Instagram

Facebook


Learn to Recognise Your Motives

learn to recognize your motives for making your choices in life. When motivated by fear or money or insecurities, you’ll make choices of equal quality. And those choices will fit the quality of your motivation. Carolynn Myss 


There are those who say that our lives reflect the choices and decisions that we make.

Even  when we are faced with matters that are outside of our control, we have to make a decision which is reflected in our response to the circumstance.


When we know who we are and what motivates us, our decisions reflect that.

When we make decisions in fear and not enoughness, the result of these decisions are reflected in our lives.

It is a challenge to go against the status quo, to go against the trends, to make unpopular decisions, we are socialised to be nice- particularly women. Grin and bear it.

When we make decisions from a people pleasing space, we diminish and devalue our voice. We lose too because trust me, not everyone will like you or the decisions that you make.


Know who you are

Know what motivates you

Know this in the depth of your soul

Then, act like you know

Peace


Have you read any of Akosua's work?

What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love



Nyabo (Madam) - Why Are You Here?

Daily Lessons on the Journey - A Journal


Follow Akosua on

Twitter

Instagram

Facebook

Forgiveness

Genuine forgiveness is a self-initiated mystical act that requires the assistance of grace to release you from the compulsive and often self-righteous chatter of the ego, which continually enforces a position of entitled anger or hurt. Carolyn Myss


Forgiveness is big!

It is the very thing that saved me from myself.

I realised that holding on to past hurts and past traumas was literally life threatening- it was getting me ill.

Forgiveness I have learnt is giving up the need for the past to change, for the past to be different, for the past to be what we deem suitable for us and for us alone! 

So what had to happen for me to forgive was to accept that the past cannot be changed, the right now is key and to move on with the lessons.

According to Carolyn Myss, forgiveness is not the act of releasing the aggressor, though it is usually interpreted this way. Nor is it a way of telling others that what they have done is “okay” with you and “all is forgiven now.” Neither of those interpretations even come close to the mystical essence of forgiveness, which is fundamentally between you and God. A genuine act of forgiveness takes place in the inner landscape where your disappointed, hurt, abused, or angry ego confronts your soul, which holds to a cosmic template of justice. The ego wants to hold another person responsible for why certain events in your life turned out as they did or for why you were hurt or treated unfairly. We always want justice to serve us and not the “other”, which, of course, means we always want to be right.


We just cannot always be right, we cannot know everything - and how boring would life be if we did know everything and have all the answers


Just know that letting go and forgiving is a way to clean the slate - and it also improves one's health!

Who can beat that?

Start with forgiving self

Peace


Guilt is a Wasted Emotion

Change your vocabulary. Specifically, give up the use of the following terms and all that they imply: blame, deserve, guilt, fair, fault. If you cut those five words from your vocabulary, both in your private thoughts and in your communication with others, you will notice almost immediately that it is far more difficult to fall into negative emotional patterns. You will also discover how habitual those patterns have become. Carolyn Myss


Guilt, I have learnt, is a wasted emotion  particularly when one makes decisions from it. Guilt happens very often when  our core beliefs are questioned and found to be wanting. Found to be not serving us. Core beliefs are usually formed through experiences from home, church, school and experiences. 

Guilt is always disruptive as it engenders fear.

I felt so guilty  on Sunday at the Bodacious Girl Gala about not mentioning the names of all the ladies from the NiNa Programme, there was guilt in not pointing them out more, in not taking enough pictures of them, not spending as much time with them that I felt was required. Then I realised that I felt guilty because of fear that I was doing them wrong. That I was not representing them well. Which was of course, not true. The entire event was about them. 

I have learnt that if all that is done is done with pure and clear intentions, seeds were planted then fear is not a place to make decisions from.


The ladies were happy, they did not have a clue that I was thinking this way, they were having fun. So, I decided to leave the guilt aside, in fact, I will take Caroline Myss's advice and eliminate it from my vocabulary altogether, see what magic happens


Peace


Bodacious Lessons

The universe is the essence of duality. To be a good giver, you must be a good receiver. And to be a good lover, you must be good at being loved. Stacey Herera



Hello my lovies


Its been a while since we have been together, let me tell you the last few days have been quite a journey. We completed our first Bodacious Girls Gala 2019 at the Castle Kilarney. A fund raiser for the NiNa Young Leaders Programme in partnership with the Cleopatra Borel Foundation.

What an amazing night we had.

I have learnt that I have difficulty asking for help, that my friends know this  and they accept me for it, just come in and support

I have learnt that there is power in having clear and noble intentions

I have learnt that love is another super power

I have learnt to follow my intuition and that things work out the way they ought to when we plant the seed, till the land, do the work with faith and belief


The Bodaciousness of this event was large! I am so proud to be associated with everyone involved and grateful to know all of them


Peace

Balance for Better

“The master's tools will never dismantle the master's house” 

Today is International Women's Day, we celebrate and honor the achievements of women all around the world on this day

I am grateful to all the women who came before, blazed the trail, paved a path, worked and sacrificed to make this now here space where I am one where I can live this privileged life.

To all the bodacious, courageous, bad ass women, thank you and I vow today to continue to live a life that will make you proud

How are you celebrating today?

Peace


40 Days of Reflection

You cannot love what you do not appreciate, and fear makes appreciation impossible. Whenever you are afraid of what you are, you do not appreciate it and will therefore reject it. As a result, you will teach rejection. ACIM



Today is the beginning of Lent. Lent is the period of 40 days which comes before Easter in the Christian calendar. Beginning on Ash Wednesday, Lent is a season of reflection and preparation before the celebrations of Easter. By observing the 40 days of Lent, Christians replicate Jesus Christ's sacrifice and withdrawal into the desert for 40 days. They do this by literally "giving up" something. Growing up, most people around me would give up meat and alcohol - just goes to show much we love our wine and swine! 

As I grew older I completely ignored Lent and giving up anything

In my house it was not strictly observed however in school and the neighbourhood, people would be strictly observing and making sacrifices within the 40 days

This year, I decided to give up flour!

Why flour?

Well, in a nutshell I love flour so much in the form of bread mainly, I have somehow convinced myself that I absolutely cannot do without it.Yes, drastic isn't it?

So this period will represent to me a form of discipline, a type of signal sent to myself that I can live without it and all will be well. It is a call to myself that I can do anything that I put my mind to.

Between flour and chocolate- man, it's tough

Maybe next Lent I will do the chocolate withdrawal - no promises!

So wish me luck

I will let you know how it all goes

Peace


Today I am on I95.5FM at 11.00AM TUNE IN


Do You Ever Question Your Beliefs

A useful thing to ask is 'when and how did I get this belief?' We tend to automatically defend our ideas without ever really questioning them. - The School of Thought

Keeping an open mind is one of the most challenging things to do in a world that promotes group think and judging others based on material possessions, religious beliefs and what's in fashion.

People have started huge disagreements over differing beliefs, some even escalating to legal battles between families and friends and bad blood which goes on for generations.

We all have beliefs and opinions, some different to others, I believe in live and let live, I may never agree with your view, and you with mine. That does not mean that I must feel the need to convert you to my own view and vice versa.

I pray that we can be open minded enough to listen long enough to learn something from another point of view even if the lesson is to continue to share a different opinion. I pray that we can allow another person to share their views without attacking them or defending ours to the point of disrespect.

I also would love us to have the ability to question some of the beliefs we hold when faced with a differing view.

No heat, No judgement

We have been groomed with beliefs from our homes, our schools, our church, our places of worship. Many times these beliefs cannot be questioned because it goes against the grain leading to punishment and being left out. So we accept them as part of the way things are. No questions asked, no thinking done.

When our intuition tells us that those said beliefs are no longer serving us, we fight to keep them, we become guilty and defensive with everyone and everything that is different, thus leading to more discontent in our lives.

It is not wrong or a betrayal to question core beliefs that no longer serve you

It is an essential part of your self care

Your life will keep showing you what works, pay attention, make a move

Peace



Carnival Musings

Everything without a single exception is mindset- shift it - Neale Donald Walsh

Today is Carnival Monday in Trinidad and Tobago. The ritual begins with a procession through the streets starting at 4am, with mud and paint and music, and fun. It really is very hard to describe. The joy that I feel on a Jouvert morning is unparalleled. To see people dancing in the streets, jumping, hugging and just being happy brings me joy.

Then the sun comes up to top it off! Jouvert starts the beginning of two days of revellery and fun. Many people see it as a wanton waste of time and money, others see it as a time of high creativity and fun times

It all starts in the mind

Today is the beginning of the greatest two days in my country's calendar

I am grateful to be a part of it

Peace



Bountiful Lives

Abundance comes to mind immediately when I see the word bountiful. Bountiful is a state of mind, it is a choice, a decision to believe that the Universe is abundant and bountiful providing for each and every single one of us. Bountiful lives require a decision to live that way because it is our God given right as children of The Most High!

Carnival is in Trinidad and Tobago is here, it is one of my favourite times of year because of the creativity, the colour, the fun, the meeting of people that I haven't seen in a very long time

It is a time that people come together in joy!

I have never experienced anything like it

Carnival in Trinidad and Tobago was born out of a rebellion, and has evolved into something full of joy, fun, innovation and change.

People either love it or hate it!

It sparks debate and controversy as well

Today is the start! There will be parties, food, events, hanging out, and much joy until next Tuesday at midnight.

If you don't hear from me, I'm inside with the Joy!

Peace

Have you read any of Akosua's work?

What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love

Nyabo (Madam) - Why Are You Here?

Daily Lessons on the Journey - A Journal

Follow Akosua on

Twitter

Instagram

Facebook



Lessons in Patience

Waiting time is a great self-love assignment. Of course the romance will fill a space in your life, and hopefully the career win is going to be fulfilling. But without those future things, you're still supreme now. You're good and beautiful today. And when you tap that self assuredness, that dignity and self worth, you're more likely to manifest what you desire for your future because you're manifesting it today. Danielle La Porte



Patience is quite a challenging skill to master! It requires a level of self belief in our part minus any proof!

How many of us look for proof that we are in the right path? 

I know that I do! I would look for proof and sometimes there is no visible proof, just a gut feeling

People would ask me questions about what I was doing, why I was doing it and self doubt sometimes set in


Patience requires courage. The Courage to make decisions

Patience requires vision - seeing the thing you desire in it's entirety

Patience requires the ability to not be defensive - no excuses, no rationale's, no justification

Patience requires showing up - this is called active waiting

Patience requires acceptance - that it may never ever look the way you anticipate, it usually it always better


Practice it, see how the magic manifests in your life


Peace

Have you read any of Akosua's work?

What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love



Nyabo (Madam) - Why Are You Here?

Daily Lessons on the Journey - A Journal


Follow Akosua on

Twitter

Instagram

Facebook



Are You Waiting to Feel Ready?

excessive expectations will block your fulfillment because life will never be able to meet your demands or fantasies that come from scarcity. And...holding on to expectations with desperate or demanding energy will drain the sweet fuck out of you. And then you end up too brittle and tired to magnetize anything to you — or enjoy it if you do get what you want. Danielle La Porte


“Being” ready is an action, “Feeling” ready is the result

“If only I was ready.”

You are, or you wouldn’t be wondering about such things. But the problem is you are looking at “ready” as a feeling, like being hungry, and you don’t find it there. “Ready” is just a decision, like eating. It comes in response to wanting food. Wanting something more. And that’s all that ready really is. Being hungry for something more.

We understand hunger and eating, because we do it daily. We eat for necessity and for enjoyment, we eat with others and we eat alone; we eat to survive. Eating does not depend on us having a good day or a bad day, waking up late, or even where we are. When we are hungry, we do what we have to; we find a way.

But we can ignore the feeling of hunger if we choose to, no matter how imperative it is. Hunger will never make you eat, even if you will die without doing so.

Being ready is just as simple, and just as imperative. If you are waiting to feel ready in order to make any change, great or small, you’ll die standing still. The feeling comes after the doing; it’s what happens when you see that you ARE ready after you’ve done something about it. In truth, feeling ready isn’t feeling hungry; that’s passion. Feeling ready is just being full; it comes after you’ve done something about it.

And the sooner you do it, the better. Just like eating, the sooner you satisfy your hunger, the sooner you have the energy to get through the obstacles in front of you. Many of us take eating for granted, simply because we do it so often we expect the next meal. We have confidence it will come, even in an uncertain world. The sooner you can feel that way about being ready, the sooner the world becomes yours. And you get there by feeding yourself a consistent dose of “doing”.

There is no feeling “ready” like we imagine it. Just an “I am hungry for more, and I am starting today. Regardless.” Now get to satisfying that hunger.

- A sign




What is Your Definition of Courage?

If you choose courage, you will know failure disappointment setback and vulnerability

Brene Browne




What does courage look like to you?

When do you tap into the courage that you need?

Do you even believe that you have courage?

Courage, I have learnt, is showing up despite the fear

It is starting the business, speaking up, writing the poem, getting the book done, asking the person out

Courage shows your vulnerable side, because being vulnerable is part of being courageous

The strength to show all sides, to not wear a mask

That is Courage to me


Peace


Have you read any of Akosua's work?

What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love



Nyabo (Madam) - Why Are You Here?

Daily Lessons on the Journey - A Journal


Follow Akosua on

Twitter

Instagram

Facebook




Your story is inspiring, your delivery is real
— Barbara Ince, President - Maloney Women's Group
The students who attended the function were so inspired by you they want all their friends to be exposed to your story.
— Cherisse Rawlins - Teacher Moruga Secondary
I must thank you for your presentation, many people were blown away by it.
— Sharon Christopher, Dep CEO First Citizens Bank Limited
It was a pleasure hosting you. Your reading from Nyabo (Madam) Why Are You Here? - was both thought provoking and insightful, thank you.
— Consulate General of the Republic of Trinidad and Tobago - New York
You are an inspiration to us all
— Marlene Charles, YWCA President
I can’t stop telling people about your presentation. You changed my life forever!
— Michele Celestine, Executive Director Heroes Foundation
What an honour and priveledge it was for me and my wife to host you during your stay in Washington DC
— Anthony WJ Phillips-Spencer, Ambassador Extraordinary Embassy of the Republic of Trinidad and Tobago
Unveiling was exactly what I needed, thank you.
— Participant at 2017's Unveiling- Looking into the Mirror of Self
Akosua, congratulations and thank you for that fabulous and thoughtful sharing from your book. I did NOTHING for the weekend but read your books. Madam, I found your story telling light and entertaining, true Trini style but DEEP.
— Sandra Ferguson, Agency for Rural Transformation, Grenada W.I
After hearing Ms. Akosua speak, I now know that I am everything and that I have everything to become who I want to be.
— Jenna Marie Bharat, Student- San Juan South Secondary School
Madam Akosua was awe inspiring. Excellent motivational skills. For me as a new retiree her words encourage me to “give back to the village”
— Anthea Doyle
Inspirational for both year groups. Forms 3 and 5. They were at the edge of their seats. prodding them to plan and even when things do not go as planned... to never give up when faced with life’s challenges
— San Juan South Secondary School
She is complete, sincere and true to herself. Akosua relates to you on what is common in all of us, our humanity.
— Odella Jowaheer