Akosua Dardaine Edwards

Let's Share Lessons on The Journey

Akosua Dardaine Edwards - author, writer, coach, gender specialist, speaker

 

What Do You Deserve?

You would not be affected by the other person's attack unless, unconsciously, you thought you deserved it. ACIM

I am learning about projecting (not projecting). 

Projecting in the form of throwing back onto another person what I either love or hate.

It's pretty weird because I always believed that when I stand up for myself after someone attacks me it meant that I was setting boundaries. That I was not letting others walk all over me. What I did learn is when I do feel attacked by someone it can be because I believe some part of the attack is real and that I deserved it. 

How can that be?

How can I believe that I deserve something like that?

Well, the ego can be a pesky little bugger

The ego believes in comparisons and not-enoughness

When you believe that subconsciously or otherwise that someone either does something that you wish you could have done, have something that you wish you had, you compare yourself to that

If the ego is ever present, we compare and get upset and jealous

If the ego is not, we are happy for that person

So when there is an attack we feel the need to defend why, why aren't we doing what we want to do, ought to be doing and in this situation.

Projecting also involves some sort of victim hood, where you make the other person wrong.

That justifies your action because they are wrong and you were wronged.

A Course in Miracles says The way your ego has led you to see things, no matter which path you take, you wind up as the loser. On the one hand, if you forgive by letting the other person off the hook, you feel like a door mat and trash. But if you don't forgive, your anger just saps your energy and you just surrender, while your guilt stays intact in your mind. With true forgiveness, no one loses. You just look at what your ego is doing without judging yourself.


So, the lesson for me is before I project ask whether it is coming from a space of ego, then proceed accordingly

Chances are if its not, no amount of attack by someone else will make you feel justified in you believing that you deserve any of it.

Peace

Have you read any of Akosua's work?

What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love

Nyabo (Madam) - Why Are You Here?

Daily Lessons on the Journey - A Journal

Follow Akosua on

Twitter

Instagram

Facebook

Your story is inspiring, your delivery is real
— Barbara Ince, President - Maloney Women's Group
The students who attended the function were so inspired by you they want all their friends to be exposed to your story.
— Cherisse Rawlins - Teacher Moruga Secondary
I must thank you for your presentation, many people were blown away by it.
— Sharon Christopher, Dep CEO First Citizens Bank Limited
It was a pleasure hosting you. Your reading from Nyabo (Madam) Why Are You Here? - was both thought provoking and insightful, thank you.
— Consulate General of the Republic of Trinidad and Tobago - New York
You are an inspiration to us all
— Marlene Charles, YWCA President
I can’t stop telling people about your presentation. You changed my life forever!
— Michele Celestine, Executive Director Heroes Foundation
What an honour and priveledge it was for me and my wife to host you during your stay in Washington DC
— Anthony WJ Phillips-Spencer, Ambassador Extraordinary Embassy of the Republic of Trinidad and Tobago
Unveiling was exactly what I needed, thank you.
— Participant at 2017's Unveiling- Looking into the Mirror of Self
Akosua, congratulations and thank you for that fabulous and thoughtful sharing from your book. I did NOTHING for the weekend but read your books. Madam, I found your story telling light and entertaining, true Trini style but DEEP.
— Sandra Ferguson, Agency for Rural Transformation, Grenada W.I
After hearing Ms. Akosua speak, I now know that I am everything and that I have everything to become who I want to be.
— Jenna Marie Bharat, Student- San Juan South Secondary School
Madam Akosua was awe inspiring. Excellent motivational skills. For me as a new retiree her words encourage me to “give back to the village”
— Anthea Doyle
Inspirational for both year groups. Forms 3 and 5. They were at the edge of their seats. prodding them to plan and even when things do not go as planned... to never give up when faced with life’s challenges
— San Juan South Secondary School
She is complete, sincere and true to herself. Akosua relates to you on what is common in all of us, our humanity.
— Odella Jowaheer