Forgiveness Works

Romantic/familial/friendly relationships force you to look at your beliefs. They create the perfect environment to grow-up the wounded child within. While inviting you to release the stories that reinjury you time and time again.

But not all relationships foster growth. Sometimes relationships are replicas of unhealthy familiarity, which can be toxic. It's not unusual to attract someone who is complicit in co-creating dysfunction with you. Arguments, belittling, name-calling, and stagnancy. Fighting for nothing and/or everything. Or never disagreeing at all (which is often a red flag). Stacey Herrera

There I am minding my own business living my life, thinking that I am moving ahead, even slowly. I receive an email coming through my website- now ususally when the email comes through the website it is most times a request to speak or appear at an event

So I start reading it, it starts off with " I read your book and it was such an authentic piece of sharing" so of course I continue with a smile on my face, then I see "remember me" now I am quite curious. She then starts to apologize, it starts with "I am sorry" now I am extra curious and goes on to a whole long story about how she is sorry about having an inappropriate relationship with my husband at the time and that she was young and naive and caught up in the intoxification blah blah blah

Well well, where is this coming from?

I started to tremble, I mean "what the whole hell?" just when I believed that I was over this! 

I decided to read the entire email - trust me it was an epistle

She apologized, she explained, she congratulated me and then held out an olive branch to make amends

Wow!

How much guts did that take?

How much thought did that take?

I sat down and had a good talk with myself- feel the feelings, do not run or hide from them

I felt them all

Now what?

Forgive - that is what I heard

Forgive?

Yup- forgive yourself for accepting less than the best and forgive them both

Be grateful - I also heard that

Be grateful?

Yes - give thanks that you are no longer that person

that made me smile

I am no longer the person that accepts less than in the name of keeping the peace, of being liked, of "how it will look" to rock the boat

Let us start from there

As soon as I did that I hit reply

Peace