The Divine Design of the Heart: Lessons in Love, Courage, and Growth

"Those who disappointed you have been instrumental in forging you into the person you are today, my love. They forced you to find love elsewhere because they simply did not have it for you. They pushed you to either die of sadness or go on a journey to the center, to the true source of love. They made you find your own ground of being. They built the cathedral of your heart with you — and yes, even for you." Elizabeth Gilbert

I have learnt- it took me a while, that there is a quiet wisdom in heartbreak, in unmet expectations, in the pain of realizing that those we love—those who once claimed to love us—could not always meet us where we stood. 

It is tempting to dwell on the disappointment, the grief, the lingering ache of rejection. But what if every one of these moments, every wound, every act of abandonment was part of a divine design?

Elizabeth Gilbert’s words linger in my mind: “They built the cathedral of your heart with you — and yes, even for you.”

What if those experiences were never about tearing me down but instead about shaping something more resilient, more whole? What if they made me kinder, more courageous—or simply courageous at all? What if each heartbreak deepened my well of empathy, not just for others but for myself? What if every disillusionment taught me the sacred art of boundaries?

These thoughts and the actions that accompany them do not come easy. To embrace this perspective is to let go—of resentment, of bitterness, of the heavy weight of “why.” It is to surrender, to accept that maybe this was never punishment but preparation. It is to trust that those who could not love me fully led me back to the one place love never wavers: within myself.

It’s easy to ask, why did I have to go through this? That question can pull me into the unfairness of it all. But someone once said: Why is not a question the Universe answers.

So instead, I ask: What can I now do with what I have learned?

Without these moments, I would not be who I am. I would not write the words I do, I would not have built the community that surrounds me today. I would not have walked so deeply into the unknown, trusting in endless possibilities.

And so, in place of resentment, I choose gratitude. In place of mourning, I choose growth. In place of asking “why,” I ask, how can I use this?

After all, if every hurt built the cathedral of my heart, then surely, I must take care of it.

Peace and Blessings

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