The Circle of Healing: Why Old Lessons Come Back When We Need Them Most

There are seasons in life when the lessons I thought I had mastered return with a force that shakes me awake. bell hooks teaches that healing through love is not simply personal work — it is collective liberation, soul-care, a way of making ourselves whole so that our communities can thrive. Her words have been echoing through me this week, asking me to look again at how I embody love, not just speak about it.

The questions that keep rising : How do I embody love more fully?. How do I live it in the quiet corners of my life? not only in the spaces where I teach, guide, or lead. To let love shape my choices, my boundaries, my self-talk, my relationships. To let love be the ground I stand on.

And yet, life has a way of circling back.

Old lessons — especially the ones tied to relationships — have returned with an intensity that made me pause. I found myself wondering: Did I not learn this already? Why is this here again? But as I sat with the discomfort, I realized something essential. Lessons don’t return because we failed. They return because we’re ready for a deeper version of the teaching.

Healing is not linear. It is circular. It spirals.

When I wrote What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love, I captured one season of my becoming. I wrote about loving myself through heartbreak, through uncertainty, through the tender work of rebuilding my self-esteem. At the time, I believed I had crossed a threshold. But life — in its wisdom — has shown me that self-love is not a chapter you complete. It is a devotion you renew.

Every time life calls me back to an old wound, it is offering me a chance to embody love in a new way. To practice compassion where I once practiced fear. To choose truth where I once chose silence. To soften where I once hardened. To deepen where I once skimmed the surface.

And this matters not only for me, but for the NiNa ladies, for the communities I serve, Leadership rooted in love is not about having all the answers. It is about living the questions with integrity. It is about showing that healing is a journey we walk together, each of us circling back to ourselves again and again.

So this week, I am choosing to sit with the lessons that have returned. I am choosing to listen. I have the tendecny to ignore, to deny, not this time. Because embodying love is not about being healed, it is about being willing. Willing to return. Willing to deepen. Willing to love myself fiercely, even when life feels sharp.

The circle of healing is not a sign of failure. It is a sign of growth. It is life reminding us that we are ready for more truth, more compassion, more wholeness. And I am learning to trust that every return is an invitation , a doorway back to myself.

Peace and Blessings