Learning to Love Bigger
“I am imagining you learning to love bigger, learning to let life in a little more, learning to stay with what you’ve long run from, learning to lean deeper into aliveness and slowly trusting you can be with the aching gold found only there.” — Lisa Olivera
I read that line this morning and felt it settle somewhere deep. Maybe because it mirrors so much of what life has been whispering lately.
A few days ago, I was chatting with a good sistren of mine. She just moved to a new city for a new job, and we were talking about the different ways people meet others, build community, and open themselves up to connection. She admitted how terrified she is of meeting new people, of being more friendly, of stretching beyond the familiar edges of her independence.
I laughed — not at her fear, but at the recognition. There’s a reason we became such good friends. We are both either terrified or simply accustomed to our own rhythms: being independent, spending more time alone than with others, finding joy in the small things, taking solo trips, choosing solitude like a soft blanket.
But everything that is out of balance eventually stops working.
And the real question is: how do we know when we’re out of balance?
Life shows us.
In the loneliness that feels heavier than usual.
In the longing we pretend not to feel.
In the opportunities we quietly avoid.
In the moments where our independence becomes a shield instead of a sanctuary.
So we made a pact — a gentle, brave one.
To love bigger.
To be present.
To pay attention to red flags and intuition, not fear.
To stay open.
To be vulnerable and authentic.
To welcome the lessons, even when they arrive wrapped in discomfort.
To trust that pain is part of the journey, not a punishment.
Cheers to this new chapter.
To letting life in a little more.
To leaning into aliveness.
To finding the aching gold that only reveals itself when we stop running.
If any part of this reflection stirred something in you — a longing, a discomfort, a quiet yes — take it as your sign. Choose one small way to love bigger today. Say hello first. Let someone in a little more. Sit with a feeling you usually outrun. Notice where independence has become armor instead of nourishment. Let life meet you halfway.
You don’t have to leap. You just have to lean.
May this be the season you soften, open, and trust that you can hold the gold waiting on the other side of your courage.
Peace and Blessings