When the Thing You Want Slips Away

Affirmation: I honor the ache and the effort. I trust the timing. I release what is not mine to carry. What is for me will not pass me by—and I meet it with grace, not grasping.

Have you ever wanted something so deeply it felt like your whole being was leaning into it? Like you could taste it, touch it, see it solving everything that felt heavy and uncertain?

I had that moment today.

This consultancy job—I wanted it with all my heart. In my mind, it was the answer to the financial strain I’ve been carrying, the quiet erosion of confidence I hadn’t even realized had taken root. It would pay off debts, restore some ease, remind me of who I am when I’m standing tall.

And yet, everywhere I turned, there were blocks. First the references. Then the health insurance. Then another thing. And another. Today, the final delay came—the insurance was taking longer than expected, and time was running out.

And something shifted.

In the past, I would’ve gone straight into solution mode. Who has time to feel when there’s a problem to solve? That’s what success looks like, right? Find the fix. Keep moving. It’s a rhythm that’s worked for me in many professional settings. But I can say now—with clarity and compassion—it hasn’t worked in many others. Especially in the tender spaces of personal and intimate relationships.

So today, I paused.

I let myself feel the ache. The disappointment. The despair. Even the flicker of hope that hadn’t quite died. I didn’t rush past it. I didn’t numb it with productivity. I sat with it. And then, I went to work—not just on the external solution, but on the internal one.

I reminded myself: I have done all that is humanly possible in this moment. I’ve shown up. I’ve tried. I’ve trusted. And now, I leave it.

“What is for you is for you” took on a whole new meaning.

This isn’t about giving up. It’s about surrendering the illusion of control. It’s about choosing to learn from the moment rather than race to the end. Starting over will be hard. But I’m learning—daily—to accept what is, and to make decisions from that space.

Not from fear. Not from lack. But from truth.

Peace and Blessings