Trying is a Dark Word
Trying is a dark, dark word - you are either do or you don't - Carolyn Myss
I pay particular attention to when I use the word try. (I think I may have mentioned before that a few have called me the "try police")
I pay attention to when I use the word because most times I use it when I am either in fear or in denial.
For example when someone asks me - Are you doing so and so? When I respond with I am trying, it usually means that I am giving it a half-assed effort and to stop the conversation I say I'm trying to show them and to justify in my mind that I am actually doing something. I really ain't doing shit but it sounds so good to say I am trying.
It also takes some pressure off of me - if I am trying and it's not working maybe I ought to stop?
I also say I am trying when I am unsure. If I am in doubt about whether I can do or complete a task.
I say I am trying to do it.
Words to me are alive, once the words are breathed into life it becomes a part of my Universe, it is so unconscious for us to say certain things without giving a second thought to it, then we wonder why certain things are happening in our lives. Granted there are many things we have absolutely no control over, nature, death, other people's behaviour and response. The things we do have a hand in, why not make it a conscious decision minus fear, guilt, rationales and justifications?
If we don't want to forgive someone yet say it - rather than "I'm trying!"
If we are not ready to eat properly and exercise say it
If we are not ready to leave a job, a relationship, a situation say it
If we are scared to start that business, say it, and wait until you are ready
When we admit it, when we are honest about it then we make room for a shift.
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